Reading Response Numero Dos

Swim The Fly is getting even more ridiculous. In the last segment I read, Matt Gratton and his two friends tried their first attempt at seeing a real live naked girl. Their plan: dress up like girls and sneak into the community center, so they can see Lindsey naked after her karate class; the result: total and complete  failure. The boys had pretty good girl costumes and made it into the community center, but unfortunately, Matt accidentally ate three scoops of laxatives right before he met with his buddies, because he thought it was protein powder, and he had to drop a load right as Lindsey walked into the girl's locker room at the community center. "I lock the door, lift my dress, and step out of my underpants before all is lost. I take a seat on the toilet and release the hell hounds. It's the worst case of the sputters I've ever had."

He flooded the whole bathroom and the gang fled the scene. The picture below shows the amount of water I imagined coming from the toilet.

I knew this book was going to be ridiculous when I started reading it, I mean, it's about prepubescent teenage boys. However, the book is very, very goofy and I think that's making me like it less, which is weird because I am very goofy. I will probably finish reading it, but the humor is getting kind of redundant. My long term prediction is that Matt will get Kelley and they will live happily ever after.

Reading Response Numero Uno

In the beginning of Swim the Fly, Matt Gratton, and his two best friends set off on a summer adventure. They always have a summer goal, whether it be to collect 5000 golf balls or learn karate, the goals must be met. Now that they are at the prime age of fifteen, they feel like they need to mature their goals, so the goal this summer is... to see a real live naked girl; no rules or stipulations of any kind.

At swim practice, Matt sees Kelly West, the new girl who he finds to be quite visually stimulating in a very positive manner. Matt, being the suave, sophisticated guy he is, says nothing to her and blushes anytime she looks at him. The swim coach, a terrible troll of a woman, asks anyone if they want to swim the butterfly at the district competition in a few weeks (The hardest stroke known to anyone ever) and in an effort to impress Kelly, Matt volunteers to swim the fly. The only problem is that Matt is a terrible swimmer and he will most definitely fail. The picture below is how I imagine Matt's goal; he wants to be a strong, majestic swimmer.

“Oh, by the way," Coop announces as he weaves his Death Bot ship through a barrage of space debris on his laptop screen." In case you didn't know. It's national 'That's What She Said' Day." This quote is a great example of the style of humor this book revolves around.  The book has a very crude, juvenile, and gross sense of humor, which I absolutely love. I can connect with the characters simply because every fifteen year old boy is obsessed with girls and would do almost anything to see one naked. This book is muy bueno so far.

SEVEN TRILLION THINGS ABOUT ME 

1-I am the average height of an adult Japanese woman (5'5")
2-I lived in Portland, Oregon from the age of five to twelve.
3-I hate Kenneth Brown more than anyone I have ever met; he's my very best friend and I love him.
4-I like to dress better than the average bear.
5-I work at Men's Wearhouse as a wedding consultant.
6-I got fourteenth in the nation at nationals in speech and debate
7-I am irrationally scared of spiders.
8- I am playing a game in Composition class right now, instead of writing this.
9-I hope to own an alpaca farm one day.
10-I am in an abusive relationship.
11-I once owned a goat that I named Spot the Dog.
12-My favorite movie is Django Unchained.
13-I just found out that my great great grandpa was in a group that helped start the KKK.
14-I am half African American, which makes #13 awkward.
15-Why should you never trust and acupuncturist?
16-Because they will always stab you in the back.